Written by Christie Stuart, Co-CEO
Earlier this year, I spent a week at Outward Bound New Zealand’s Tū Kahikatea leadership course in Anakiwa.
There were chilly early morning starts, cold water plunges, hours (upon hours!) of rowing when the wind disappeared, and plenty of moments when my body was asking, how much longer?
It was physically tough at times. But that was actually part of the reason I wanted to do it.
At Big Buddy, we ask a lot of the teenage boys who take part in our eight-week Group Programme, and of the volunteer mentors who show up alongside them.
We ask boys to step into an unfamiliar environment, spend time with people they don’t know, try things that might feel uncomfortable, and be open to learning about themselves and each other.
We ask our mentors to do much the same. To turn up, be present, build trust, listen, challenge, encourage and sometimes sit alongside a young person through things that aren’t easy.
So, for me, there was something important about experiencing a little of that for myself.
Walk the walk, not just talk the talk.
I wanted to know what it feels like to be the person stepping outside their comfort zone. To be tired, uncertain, challenged and occasionally wondering why I had signed up for this in the first place!
And, just as we see with our boys, there were also moments of connection, laughter, achievement and surprise.
What stood out most wasn’t any single activity. It was what happens when you strip away the usual noise and routine. Without the busy calendar, familiar surroundings and everyday distractions, you have a bit more space to notice how you think, how you respond under pressure, how you relate to others and how you show up.
It reminded me that growth rarely happens when everything is comfortable.
That feels particularly relevant to the work we do at Big Buddy. Our Group Programme isn’t about putting teenage boys through a set of activities for eight weeks and sending them home. It is about creating the conditions for connection, challenge and growth, alongside positive male mentors and other boys who understand something of what they are experiencing.
Having now experienced a small taste of what it feels like to be the participant, I have an even greater appreciation for what we ask of them.
And I have a renewed respect for the volunteer mentors who choose to give their time and energy to do it alongside them.
A partnership we value
In 2024, a number of our Little Buddies attended the Outward Bound Leaps and Bounds course alongside their Big Buddies. Outward Bound has also provided scholarships at times for young people connected to Big Buddy to take part in their programmes.
These opportunities matter.
These experiences give boys the opportunity to challenge themselves, build confidence and create positive memories alongside trusted adults — something that sits very closely alongside what we are trying to achieve through Big Buddy.
I’m grateful to the Outward Bound team for the experience, and to my fellow Huria Watch, who started the week as strangers and quickly became a source of challenge, support and connection.
I’ve was also reminded throughout the week of the many mentors I have been fortunate to learn from over my career. Their influence was never far away.
I came home exhausted, slightly more humble, and with a stronger sense of perspective.
Most importantly, I came home with an even greater appreciation for what we ask of the boys and mentors who take part in Big Buddy’s Group Programme.
And perhaps most importantly, with a renewed appreciation for the importance of walking the walk.
Some snapshots of our Group Programme
Thank you to Outward Bound and The Joyce Fisher Trust for facilitating this experience for Big Buddy and other fellow Charity Leaders.
